Night Before

Finally the night has come, the one that I have known since the start of all this was going to be the hardest. The mix of emotions is hard to put into words but it something like the urge to cry, scream, throw up, jump around, run laps, kick, punch, dance all at the same time. It is almost too much for my system to handle but I know it will all be better once I can just get on the plane and focus on the task ahead. It is not the "going to" that is creating this mixed bag of emotions, it's the "leaving from." My family, my friends, my comfort zone, my favorite foods, my music, my ability to transport myself freely around where ever I damn well want at any given time...my toilet...all these things that I have grown to take for granted in my life and now I have to go and see what life is like without them.

I'm scared, and I think that anyone that is at the point that I am at right now and isn't feeling the same hasn't thought about how much of a game changer this all is. My family and friends have been so amazingly supportive and wonderful and kind and caring and fabulous and I can't even begin to say how much I love them and how blessed I feel to have them in my life. They are amazing beyond words and I am going to miss them more than would be possible to describe.

I'm going to try and pass out now, get a few winks before waking up and heading off to philly. Will try and update when I can.

See you on the other side ;)

Love,
Claire